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I have always been interested in psychology. I am always the one that gives advice and
counsels friends. I started taking notice. Listening, watching and studying different scenarios.
I came up with different stories that I had heard and things I had seen. I thought that if I could
write about things that people don’t talk about, then men and women who read the book could
become more sensitive to maybe some of the things they were doing or going through and
the book could possibly help. I wanted to focus on these situations and that every single one
of them were real. They may sound bizarre but they are real.
Even though she includes in her disclaimer that this is the book was for “entertainment
purposes,” she succeeded in offering solid advice and some of which were on serious topics
like domestic violence, rape and HIV and stressed the importance of using protection during
intercourse (on more than one occasion.) It’s commendable that she is using her celebrity
status to educate others.
And speaking of celebrity, there are several who are adamant about their fans not calling them
by their former television or movie character’s name. But, Stanis embraces it. After all, her
website is www.ThelmaofGoodTimes.com. It doesn’t get anymore accepting than that.
I love it! It was a wonderful part in my life. The world knows me as Thelma. I’m just like a
relative like when you come up with a cousin and you can call her by a certain name. Then
all of a sudden, she changes her name when she grows up and you’re like, “What!” When my
fans come up to me, I’m Thelma. They would say, “I know your name is Bern Nadette” and
then the next second, they would say “Hey, Thelma!” I go right along with it. You can call me
Thelma. It’s all right with me. (laughs)
Throughout the interview, our conversation wondered off to parenting. The mother of two
daughters had this advice for me and other young mothers:
Children need as much as love and as much cuddling as they want. If they feel they need it,
then you give it to them. Don’t worry about spoiling them. When kids get to be five or six, they
will get unspoiled. They are going to want to be with their friends. Don’t spoil in the sense that
if they are doing something wrong, you correct them. You don’t have to give them everything
they want. No, that’s when discipline comes in. When it comes to love and affection, you can
never spoil a child enough.
Am I hearing another book in the process? And finally, the question I had wanted to ask her
since her appearance on Girlfriends! How does she manage to look the same after all these
years?
I think it has a lot to do with prayers. I’m a real old-fashioned girl. I think prayers have a way of
relieving pressure and I have always felt that it gives you peace. With that peace, you don’t
worry as much so you don’t stress as much. You do stress just like everyone else but with
prayers and devotion to God. I do that and I think it has a way of relieving some pressure and
so maybe it has kept me from getting wrinkles.
Amen, sista!
In conclusion, here is what I took away from Situations 101:
Make sure your man does not have any male friends in France
Don’t hook up with a man if he can’t give you gas money
Don’t go to Hawaii with doctors who don’t even know your marital status or bother to ask
Beware of “the cousin” (in more than one situation)
Thanks Bern Nadette for speaking with The Black Spotlight!
Order a copy of Situations 101: Relationships The Good, The Bad… And the Ugly from and
her book of seductive poetry, For Men Only from her official website, thelmaofgoodtimes.com.
It makes for a great strawberries and champagne moment!
counsels friends. I started taking notice. Listening, watching and studying different scenarios.
I came up with different stories that I had heard and things I had seen. I thought that if I could
write about things that people don’t talk about, then men and women who read the book could
become more sensitive to maybe some of the things they were doing or going through and
the book could possibly help. I wanted to focus on these situations and that every single one
of them were real. They may sound bizarre but they are real.
Even though she includes in her disclaimer that this is the book was for “entertainment
purposes,” she succeeded in offering solid advice and some of which were on serious topics
like domestic violence, rape and HIV and stressed the importance of using protection during
intercourse (on more than one occasion.) It’s commendable that she is using her celebrity
status to educate others.
And speaking of celebrity, there are several who are adamant about their fans not calling them
by their former television or movie character’s name. But, Stanis embraces it. After all, her
website is www.ThelmaofGoodTimes.com. It doesn’t get anymore accepting than that.
I love it! It was a wonderful part in my life. The world knows me as Thelma. I’m just like a
relative like when you come up with a cousin and you can call her by a certain name. Then
all of a sudden, she changes her name when she grows up and you’re like, “What!” When my
fans come up to me, I’m Thelma. They would say, “I know your name is Bern Nadette” and
then the next second, they would say “Hey, Thelma!” I go right along with it. You can call me
Thelma. It’s all right with me. (laughs)
Throughout the interview, our conversation wondered off to parenting. The mother of two
daughters had this advice for me and other young mothers:
Children need as much as love and as much cuddling as they want. If they feel they need it,
then you give it to them. Don’t worry about spoiling them. When kids get to be five or six, they
will get unspoiled. They are going to want to be with their friends. Don’t spoil in the sense that
if they are doing something wrong, you correct them. You don’t have to give them everything
they want. No, that’s when discipline comes in. When it comes to love and affection, you can
never spoil a child enough.
Am I hearing another book in the process? And finally, the question I had wanted to ask her
since her appearance on Girlfriends! How does she manage to look the same after all these
years?
I think it has a lot to do with prayers. I’m a real old-fashioned girl. I think prayers have a way of
relieving pressure and I have always felt that it gives you peace. With that peace, you don’t
worry as much so you don’t stress as much. You do stress just like everyone else but with
prayers and devotion to God. I do that and I think it has a way of relieving some pressure and
so maybe it has kept me from getting wrinkles.
Amen, sista!
In conclusion, here is what I took away from Situations 101:
Make sure your man does not have any male friends in France
Don’t hook up with a man if he can’t give you gas money
Don’t go to Hawaii with doctors who don’t even know your marital status or bother to ask
Beware of “the cousin” (in more than one situation)
Thanks Bern Nadette for speaking with The Black Spotlight!
Order a copy of Situations 101: Relationships The Good, The Bad… And the Ugly from and
her book of seductive poetry, For Men Only from her official website, thelmaofgoodtimes.com.
It makes for a great strawberries and champagne moment!
BERN NADETTE STANIS INTERVIEW cont...
THE BLACK SPOTLIGHT
Shining A Light on African American Entertainment & Culture